#day100

#100happydays #day100

The challenge 100 happy days - CAN YOU BE HAPPY FOR 100 DAYS?

I started this journey to find real happiness, find my smile.

Well it is now day 100. The last 100 days has been a journey balancing and processing many emotions. I remember day 1, I was so upset I had been crying most of the afternoon because of over-thinking irrelevant events that I had worked up in my own head. But I made a promise to myself, no more!! 

I have found a calming balance, the power to fight and most importantly the willingness within to love myself (you could say the no bullshit factor).

I can be me, I feel more comfortable being me, in my own company. I don't need people. If anything I have less people and you know what? I am okay with that.

See no matter how depressed you are there is and always will be one thing in every day that is good. Something is always good. 

No one person can be miserable forever. It is whether you choose to let yourself feel that way or choose to make a difference in your own life. Fuck everyone else. Making other people happy makes you miserable. Don't fool yourself thinking you love making people happy, especially to the detriment of ones self.

I have spent my entire "teen/adult" days trying to make people love me. Yes some of you do love me, but you love me for me not because of what I have done for you.

I have been a horrible person, I have abused others especially loved ones more so, either verbally, physically and/or mentally. I am so truly sorry for having done this and I am ever so blessed to still have those people who put up with me through those times and still be here now.

When you look back over the last 100 days you will see obviously I am obsessed with the sky and food hahaha... but everything i love in everyday life. There is always something beautiful in every day.

So now for me. I have set some new goals to aim for. I look forward to my future, I look forward to spending more time with my kids. They are friggen awesome! I look forward to spending more time with friends and family. 

I hope to have love come my way again. To have someone to live life with.

Thankyou everyone for supporting me on this small journey. I hope to have brought some positivity in to your lives daily. I have done it. I have stuck to something for quite a while and not given up. 

It has been so much fun! I love my life! I am so lucky.

I am happy! :)

#100happy days #day100

xoxo